When people hear that a person is “assertive,” it’s likely that the first thought is that they are ‘bossy’ or ‘pushy’. However behaving assertively is a positive way to get what you want as well as determine mutually-advantageous solutions to issues.
So I’m am a regular at my local rec center basketball courts as a way to exercise. In the area I play, there are 4 courts specifically for full-court games. Often, I walk in to find a game ongoing, and about 20 other people waiting for a games with their team, despite the fact that there are 3 courts to play on. This is because most people are not assertive enough to begin a match on one of the free courts. As I’m trying to be assertive, I usually organize a game by finding 9 others that are waiting to play. This benefits me and benefits the others, as soon after there’s a line waiting to go on the free court.
This short story notes a few pieces of advice concerning how to become more assertive:
1. Start small
If you’re not accustomed to being assertive, then you won’t find much benefit from taking on your big bank to remove your monthly service fees for your account. Learn to cope with people first , before you begin taking your skills to alter institutional bureaucracy. This way will also help you learn how your position appeals to the personal interests of the individual, which follows to the second point.
2. Exactly how will you getting what you want be beneficial to the other person.
Humans usually act in their own self interest. If you can figure out how to advise a person that what is best for you is also best for them, you will find success. Use human nature in your advantage, and figure out a way to explain how what you want is what the other person(s) want.
3. Always Consistent
The first time you try to implement this, you may fail, and that’s totally fine. However, if you aren’t ongoing in your tries, you’re unlikely to achieve success. Determine why your assertive methods failed and next time change up your approach. Eventually your underlying assertiveness will become the norm, making you more successful person.